Stress is a natural part of being human, it helps us survive and progress. Yet it becomes harmful when we allow it to be driven by fear, anger and anxiety. We don’t have to run away from hairy mammoths anymore but when we allow the destructive beast of chronic stress to rear its ugly head, then we’re in trouble. It causes dis-ease in our minds and our bodies, we function below par and eventually we get ill.
We set such high expectations on ourselves and others, we hold tight to the outcomes, we tie ourselves in knots trying to ‘get it right’. But the tighter we hold the butterfly, the more we crush its wings. We have to learn to let go. That doesn’t mean we have to remain passive. What we can do, following the coaching process, is manage our lives so that we make the most of what we have, whilst remaining open to other possibilities.
- We create big goals and dreams and we take manageable small steps towards them.
- We recognise and overcome the blocks, limiting beliefs and self-sabotage that stops us taking those steps
- We make sure we are driven from the foundation stones of our core values (the standards by which we recognise that we function optimally, ie time rich, acting with kindness, giving space for friendships etc)
- We identify and set out to meet our own needs and don’t place expectation on others to meet them for us
- We take responsibility for our actions
- We don’t blame others
- We surround ourselves with positive people who support and stand by us, and don’t suck away our energy with their needs and expectations
- We forgive others their transgressions in order to let go of our own pain and anger
- We are ready and flexible enough to shift and alter our path as circumstances and challenges demand
- We build in self-care, timeout, and a slower pace
When we have created this environment for ourselves we are able surrender to the outcome. Why? Because we have done what we can to create a life that is full, meaningful and forward-looking, we enjoy the process, and when the good stuff happens then we celebrate it as an added bonus.
It is hard to do this on your own, so if you are of the courageous minded and prepared to do what it takes, contact me and I will work with you to de-stress and build a contented, happy and fearless life. Lou@createlab.co.uk
My book of illustrations “Brave New Girl- How to Be Fearless” is to be published by Orion Books in September 2016